RX For Marriage (And All Other Relationships)
Passage: Ephesians 4:26-32; I John 1:6-10
Martin Luther’s first of the 95 Theses he nailed on the Wittenberg church in 1517 was: “When our Lord and Master Jesus Christ said, `Repent’ (Mt 4:17), he willed the entire life of believers to be one of repentance.”
Luther nailed it. The entirety of the Christian life is one of repentance.
Jesus clearly implied this when He taught us to pray saying, “Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”
Just as daily bread is necessary for our physical health and wellbeing, so daily repentance is necessary for our spiritual health and wellbeing.
We live in a Genesis 3 world.
Sin has corrupted and polluted and infected everything in all of creation. This is a fallen world. We are all sinners and we all sin all the time, in our thoughts, words and actions. We cannot be surprised when we sin and when we are sinned against. We will hurt and offend and disappoint each other. I have sinned against you, and you have sinned against me.
But we also live in a Matthew 1:21 world, Jesus came into the world to save sinners, to not leave us in our sin. Jesus came bringing the Gospel of salvation, repentance and forgiveness.
And we live in a I John 1:9 world, if we confess and repent, God will forgive us. I John 1:9 clearly implies, repentance is an ongoing, constant work. It is the constant work of the Holy Spirit in sanctifying us to convict us of our indwelling sin. So we are not without hope.
This subject has been on my mind for some time now. As a pastor I am privy to how things are going in some of our lives and relationships and marriages. As a married man I can make some pretty safe assumptions about what goes on in all our homes. As a sinful human I can make some pretty safe assumptions about what goes on in our relationships.
This morning I want to jump into the middle of all our relationships and give some Biblical counsel. If you are married think of this as a marriage counseling session, totally free. If you are in a conflict with another person, think of this as a conflict resolution session, totally free.
You have heard me say often no significant human relationship can survive without repentance and forgiveness. And that is especially true of marriage, no marriage can survive and thrive without repeated repentance and repeated forgiveness.
The issues that affect all our relationships, the issues that make our marriages difficult are not complicated, in fact, they are very simple. One three letter word. Sin.
Every marriage starts with the seeds of its own destruction, two people who are sinners living under one roof. All marriage problems at their root are sin problems. This means every marriage is in trouble if they don’t recognize this fatal flaw and know what to do with it.
The problem with much marriage counseling and relational counseling is it doesn’t start with the root problem. They might talk about the past, about families of origin, about personalities, about past hurts, about various symptoms of the problem, but seldom do they get to the root, sin.
Sin is the fundamental problem of all our marriages; and humble repentance is the fundamental solution. Husbands and wives must become experts in the art of saying “I was wrong. I hurt you. I am sorry, I sinned against you and I ask for your forgiveness.”
This morning let’s get some tools to become experts at repentance in all our relationships.